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Panicked aliens unable to leave Earth “hellhole” due to gas prices
Musk’s Twitter audit finds 80% of users are mindless drones
Bette Midler advises blind people to “try seeing”
FDA suggests formula-deprived babies simply “eat cake”
CNN+ and Netflix found in discount bin at Goodwill
Culture
Twitter relieved as billionaires save it from takeover by other billionaire
Culture
Citizens observe Tax Day with traditional offerings to god of roads
Culture
Musk buys community bulletin boards, allows unmoderated Post-it notes
Culture
Twitter terror as Musk releases “bombs” filled with banned opinions
Culture
Psaki leaves D.C. comedy gig for MSNBC soap opera role
Culture
Biden awarded Oscar for “I Don’t Ask Hunter About His Business”...
Culture
CNN nabs Best Fictional News Series award for third consecutive year
Culture
Putin briefs TikTok stars on state-approved artistic expression
Culture
Smollett falls victim to another invisible sandwich-based hate crime
Culture
Buttigieg advises poor people to “just ride in their palanquins” to...
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