Trump Vows Fiscal Responsibility “Right After the Next Holiday”

Citing frustration with Democrats’ overspending, President Donald Trump has called for a return to the fiscal responsibility on which the GOP prides itself. He has made it clear that after the planned aircraft carrier giveaway event at his upcoming “MAGA Extravaganza,” he intends to put an abrupt stop to any more spending.

Sitting at his desk in the Oval Office after the “Salute to America,” Trump talked with our reporters as he casually signed a list of blank checks to the newly appointed Special Holiday Commission. And he decried the financial irresponsibility of the liberals with seemingly every signature. “I haven’t seen such wanton disregard for tax dollars since all the times I was a member of the Democratic Party,” he fumed. “It’s like these people think they can spend whatever they want and then file bankruptcy every time they go broke.”

Trump continued to explain that he had already formulated a plan to solve the money crisis. “After whatever the next holiday is, we are putting a halt to it. I think it’s Labor Day? So after the Labor Day aircraft carrier thing, it stops. Period.”

After a commission member reminded Trump that he had already asked them to begin work on the White House’s Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade float, the president quickly clarified, “We’ll be ceasing after Thanksgiving. Period.”