Chinese national anthem to be played at all future NBA games

In their ongoing effort to prove themselves the most forward-thinking sports league, the NBA has abandoned the oppressive U.S. national anthem and replaced it with that of the People’s Totally Democratic and Super Liberated Republic of China, a country known for its more progressive humanitarian views.

“Completely of his own free will and with no monetary incentive, one of our more obedient underlings expressed concern that we were not worshiping our financial lord and master devoutly enough,” explained commissioner Adam Silver. “The NBA has always valued freedom of expression among our people, provided it is politically and financially convenient for us, so we were eager to support his suggestion to make a few changes.”

Asked what other differences fans might be seeing, Silver explained that the league didn’t want to go overboard and would keep it subtle. “Other than the Chinese flag and Xi Jinping mural, not much will be noticeable. We already have all our gear and apparel made by Chinese child laborers, so it wasn’t much effort to just sell what little of our souls were remaining to their government.”

11225 COMMENTS

  1. The Working Group Carrying-on Of which requires offensive cervical to a handful that develops patients and RD, wood and pandemic vigour, and then reaches an influential differential of profitРІitРІs senior set at 21 it. buy sildenafil viagra online pharmacy

  2. Hello, i think that i saw you visited my blog thus i came to “return the favor”.I am trying to find things to improve my web site!I suppose its ok to use a few of your ideas!!

  3. I absolutely love your site.. Excellent colors & theme. Did you make this amazing site yourself? Please reply back as I’m looking to create my very own site and want to know where you got this from or what the theme is called. Thank you!

  4. Great work! This is the kind of info that are supposed to be shared across the internet. Disgrace on Google for not positioning this post higher! Come on over and visit my site . Thank you =)

  5. Hey just wanted to give you a quick heads up. The words in your post seem to be running off the screen in Chrome. I’m not sure if this is a format issue or something to do with browser compatibility but I thought I’d post to let you know. The layout look great though! Hope you get the issue resolved soon. Kudos

  6. Hi there just wanted to give you a quick heads up. The words in your post seem to be running off the screen in Firefox. I’m not sure if this is a format issue or something to do with web browser compatibility but I figured I’d post to let you know. The layout look great though! Hope you get the issue fixed soon. Thanks

  7. First of all I want to say wonderful blog! I had a quick question that I’d like to ask if you do not mind. I was interested to know how you center yourself and clear your thoughts prior to writing. I have had a hard time clearing my thoughts in getting my thoughts out there. I trul

    온라인카지노
    y do enjoy writing however it just seems like the first 10 to 15 minutes are generally wasted simply just trying to figure out how to begin. Any suggestions or tips? Thank you!
    webpage

  8. Undeniably believe that that you said. Your favourite justification seemed to be on the net
    the simplest factor to keep in mind of. I say to you, I definitely
    get annoyed while folks consider concerns that they just don’t realize about.
    You controlled to hit the nail upon the top as smartly as defined
    out the entire thing without having side effect , other people could take a signal.

    Will likely be again to get more. Thank you http://cialllis.com/