Encouraging study shows toilet paper jokes finally on the decline

Photo by Steven Depolo on flickr

After an exponential increase in irritating quips about toilet paper hoarding, experts say cases appear to have peaked, and the meme situation is once again under control.

“It was touch and go there for a few weeks,” fretted one self-professed social media expert. “I could hardly find room to post my own hand sanitizer GIFs, the feed was so saturated with ‘TP this’ and ‘bidet that.’

“It seemed like the Charmin references would never end,” she shuddered.

Bored stay-at-home parents and quarantined college students began reporting a frightening increase in toilet-tissue-related social media posts about a month ago, when an apparently contagious form of stupidity led seemingly normal adults to descend on the paper aisle like rabid vultures. Horrified onlookers used humor to cope with the frightening catastrophe, exacerbating the toilet paper shortage with a surplus of dangerously unfunny gags and wisecracks.

“Next time, I hope we’ll all be more prepared for this type of crisis,” admonished one Facebook devotee. “We know people are not going to stop hoarding bizarre supplies during an emergency, but we can at least prepare ourselves with a funnier–and more varied–stash of memes.”